Name It to Tame It: The Science Behind Emotional Literacy

Name It to Tame It: The Science Behind Emotional Literacy

You’ve probably heard the phrase: “Name it to tame it.”
It’s simple, memorable — and it’s backed by neuroscience.

But what does it really mean? And how does it help children (and adults) manage their big emotions with confidence?

Let’s dive into the science behind emotional literacy, and why naming our feelings is one of the most powerful tools we can give our kids.

🧠 What Does “Name It to Tame It” Mean?

Coined by Dr. Dan Siegel, a leader in interpersonal neurobiology, “Name it to tame it” is the idea that when we put words to what we feel, we reduce the intensity of that emotion.

In other words:

When we name the feeling, we calm the nervous system.

This simple act of emotional labelling activates the prefrontal cortex (our rational, reasoning brain) and helps regulate the amygdala (our fight/flight/freeze centre). It creates space between feeling and reacting — and in that space, we find choice, calm, and connection.

🧒 Why Naming Feelings Is Crucial for Kids

For young children, emotions can feel huge and overwhelming. Without the words to describe them, kids may act out physically, shut down emotionally, or lash out verbally — not because they’re “bad,” but because they’re overwhelmed.

Teaching emotional literacy — the ability to recognise, understand, and name emotions — gives children the power to:

• Understand what’s happening inside their bodies

• Express needs instead of exploding

• Build empathy and self-awareness

• Regulate big feelings with more confidence

• Feel empowered, not ashamed of their emotions

Naming emotions builds the bridge between the body and the brain — and that’s how resilience begins.

🧩 What the Research Shows

Multiple studies confirm what many educators and caregivers already know:

• Labelling emotions reduces stress and physiological arousal

• Children who develop emotional literacy early on show better social skills, improved mental health, and stronger academic outcomes

• Naming emotions is a core skill in emotional regulation and trauma recovery

Put simply: words help us work through feelings.

✋ Try This: “When I Feel X, I Can Do Y”

This is a framework we use in our books and workshops — and it’s gold for building real-life emotional strategies:

• When I feel angry, I can jump on my trampoline

• When I feel nervous, I can hold someone’s hand

• When I feel sad, I can snuggle my soft toy

It’s not just cute — it’s neurologically empowering. You’re helping children make a clear connection between emotion, awareness, and action.

📚 A Tool to Help: Helping Toddlers with Feelings

Our book Helping Toddlers with Feelings was designed with this exact science in mind. It teaches children:

• How to name what they feel

• How to pair each emotion with a calming strategy

• That feelings are safe, normal, and never something to be afraid of

And it helps caregivers feel more confident, too — because when we understand the why behind the meltdowns, the power struggles, and the big emotions, we can show up with more calm, clarity, and compassion.

💛 Final Thought

Emotions don’t need to be avoided, fixed, or pushed down.
They need to be felt, named, and worked through.

So the next time your child is spiralling into a tantrum, remember:

“Can you tell me how you’re feeling?” is more powerful than “Stop that.”

Because naming it really does help tame it.

And in that moment of naming, we give our children what they need most: ✨ Language.
✨ Safety.
✨ Empowerment.