Are Boys Easier Than Girls? Let’s Talk About Feelings and Emotions in Children

Are Boys Easier Than Girls? Let’s Talk About Feelings and Emotions in Children

“Boys are easier.”
“Girls are more emotional.”
“Boys don’t talk about their feelings.”
“Girls are dramatic.”

Sound familiar?

Whether whispered at the school gate or passed down from generation to generation, these beliefs still sneak into how we view children — especially when it comes to feelings and emotions. But here's the truth:

❗️Children aren’t “easier” or “harder” based on gender.
They’re individuals — each with a full, beautiful, messy inner world that deserves to be seen, supported, and understood.

So let’s talk about it.

💡 Where Do These Beliefs Come From?

These stereotypes didn’t appear out of nowhere. For years, society has shaped the emotional expectations we place on children:

• Boys are often encouraged to “toughen up,” be strong, be brave.

• Girls are often told they’re “too sensitive,” “too dramatic,” or praised for being emotionally aware.

Over time, these messages influence how children express, suppress, or explore their emotions — not because of biology, but because of social conditioning.

🧠 What the Research Says

Modern child development research tells us:

• Boys and girls experience emotions equally deeply — but may express them differently based on what’s been modelled or allowed.

• Boys are just as sensitive as girls, especially in the early years — and in fact, some studies show infant boys cry more often and intensely than girls.

• Children of any gender need emotional validation, tools, and guidance to build resilience.

So if your son seems “easier” than your daughter, it might not be about gender. It might be about personality, temperament, stage of development, or even how they’re allowed to express emotion in your home or school.

👩‍👦 A Personal Reflection

As a mum of three boys, I’ve lived this conversation from the inside out. And here’s the truth — they are each completely different.

Not because of their gender.
But because they’re different humans.

Each with their own temperament, sensitivity, and way of expressing the world.
And truthfully, I was a different parent with each of them.

Our lives were different.
Our surroundings were different.
I was different.

And that shaped the way they grew, how they expressed emotion, and how I responded.

It’s never just about the child — it’s about the whole ecosystem they’re growing in.

💬 What Can We Do Instead?

Rather than dividing children into “easy” or “emotional,” let’s ask:

“How can I support this child to understand and express what they feel in a healthy way?”

Here’s how we can move beyond the gender myths and into emotionally intelligent parenting and teaching:

1. Model Emotional Literacy

Use words like:

“I feel disappointed, but I can still try again.”
“It’s okay to cry. Want to talk about it?”

Your modelling teaches boys and girls that emotions are human, not gendered.

2. Create Safe Spaces for All Feelings

Normalize emotional expression — even (especially) the big, messy ones.
Let boys be vulnerable.
Let girls be assertive.
Let all kids be real.

3. Use Resources That Reflect All Experiences

Books, visuals, and stories that show diverse emotional expression help break stereotypes and validate feelings.

(Psst… our Helping Toddlers with Feelings and How Am I Feeling? books are perfect for this.)

4. See the Child, Not the Label

Every child is different.
The quiet girl might be bottling up anxiety.
The loud boy might be processing fear.
Our job is to look beneath the surface and offer support, not assumptions.

🌈 Final Thought

So… are boys easier than girls?

The real question is: what does “easy” mean?
Quiet? Obedient? Emotionally contained?

That’s not the goal.

The goal is to raise children — regardless of gender — who can:

• Recognise what they feel

• Express it safely

• Ask for help when needed

• Know that all emotions are valid

And to do that, we need to meet them where they are — not where old stories told us they should be.

📚 Tools for Raising Emotionally Aware Children

Our picture books and programs are designed to help children feel their feelings, build resilience, and develop lifelong emotional skills — from toddlerhood through to the teen years.

✨ Browse our book collection here →